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Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Moving On, Closer to Closer

"I'll never move on! I love him!" I swore by this statement twice in all my life. Once, a year ago. Again, for the past 3 months. I was wrong, only once.


3 months ago, I started to believe that I had fallen for Jon. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. Does it matter? I didn't think I could move on. We had a bit of an, erm... misunderstanding, and I was over him in a week, after 3 months of professing my so- called "undying love" for him. 


Last summer, I developed a HUGE crush Ethan. He was there for me, and he told me about himself and I trusted himself with all of the things I never even told Shay when we were best friends. Thus, I fell. And I swore I wouldn't get over him. Then, I didn't see him for a year. I thought of him often, but still I dated others. I liked other male specimens and flirted with quite a good many of my close guy friends. But alas!, when I see him again a year later, I am filled with the same feelings of love and admiration that I had felt the year before. I know that this is crazy, because my saying "hi" seems to creep him out these days. But this is DEFINITELY the longest crush I've ever had on anyone. Could it be... that I... the cold, heartless wretch I am.... could I have TRULY fallen in love with someone? Is it finally my turn to feel that true rush of feeling? Is it possible that my heart has melted with the help of global warming and am now capable of feeling love for another person? The very thought... it amazes me...






So I've moved on. From Jon at least. And now I move closer to closer from the fiasco between the two of us. But I haven't moved on from Ethan. At all. And that closer is not to be found yet. But maybe... maybe one day...






Love,
   Paige

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